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An enormous list of all the facts!

 

Kim Jong-un has a trophy case case. 

Kim Jong-un got a technical foul for hanging somebody from the rim. 

Kim Jong-un killed Colonel Mustard in the Hall with the Billiard Room. 

Kim Jong-il once stared at the sun for so long that the sun looked away. 

Kim Jong-un does not permit two way mirrors in North Korea. All mirrors are his way. 

Kim Jong-un can recycle water with his bare hands. 

As a high school quarterback, Kim Jong-un once threw an interception to himself and returned it for a touchdown.

Letter related puzzles are banned in North Korea, as Kim Jong-un won’t let anyone utter a crossword.

Kim Jong-un can train rats to create mazes. 

While playing soccer, Kim Jong-il once scored a header on the kick off.

Kim Jong-il won the North Korea Marathon, which is 262 miles since the decimal point is banned in North Korea.

Kim Jong-un’s hide-and-seek playmates have never been found. 

Kim Jong-un’s voice is so powerful it echoes underwater.

Not only can Kim Jong-il look directly into the sun, he prefers to.

Kim Jong-il broke the world record in the triple jump despite jumping backwards on his second jump.

Kim Jong-il has 20/20 foresight.

Kim Jong-il once struck out the side on 9 pitches.  The first 8 were balls.

Kim Jong-il once scored 65 points in a game of catch.

Kim Jong-un can build an igloo out of fire. 

Kim Jong-il beat a bear in an eating contest by consuming 88 hotdogs, 12 pounds of Spaghetti, 16 apple pies, the bear, and the judges.

Kim Jong-il jumps octuple dutch.

Kim Jong-il swam to the top of Mt. Everest.

Kim Jong-il once competed in Greco-Roman Wrestling and sacked Rome.

Kim Jong-il jumped the Grand Canyon on a Unicycle. 

Kim Jong-il could type 400 words per minute with an abacus. 

Kim Jong-il won the gold in Olympic weightlifting when he lifted 405.5 kilograms into orbit.

Kim Jong-il won several golds in Skeleton with sheer numbers.

Kim Jong-un’s record in the long jump is on-going. 

Kim Jong-il won the Pole Vault by stuffing 15,000 Polish citizens into his Vault.

Kim Jong-il routinely double-jumps with his pawns.

Kim Jong-il went on “Who Wants to be a Millionaire”, guessed E, Final Answer each time and won $40 billion.

Kim Jong-il played Tic Tac Dough and won the Dragon.

Kim Jong-il once recorded 12 sacks in a game of miniature golf.

Kim Jong-il  could perform a septuple Lindy. 

It takes a village to raise child, but only Kim Jong-un to raze a village. 

Kim Jong-un can make a slinky walk UP stairs.

Kim Jong-il  ran the 100 meters in 7.65 seconds, while assisting the wind. 

In North Korea’s Dancing with the Stars, Kim Jong-un always wins with his partner Alpha Centauri. 

Kim Jong-un has dissidents hanged on his every word. 

Kim Jong-il put a shark in the Figure Four Leglock. 

Everytime Kim Jong-un opens a fortune cookie it contains $5 million. 

Kim Jong-un can get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop in under one lick.

Kim Jong-il won the World Series of Poker with a hand of: 1 ace of spades, 1 4 of diamonds, 1 wild draw four, 1 get out of jail free card, And a Honus Wagner Rookie card.

Kim Jong-il  was such a skilled archer he shot the Adams apple off of his sons’s head. 

Kim Jong-il finished second in the Daytona 500 while racing without a car.

It only takes Kim Jong-un 3.3 seconds to change a tire – into sunshine. 

Kim Jong-il once bowled a 300 with one tank.

Kim Jong-un owns a fabrege chicken. 

Kim Jong-il made every snowflake in North Korea the same.

Kim Jong-un bested his father’s drive of 574 yards by hitting a ball 585 yards with a tire iron. 

Kim Jong-il  once caught a train. With a net. 

Kim Jong-un is so good at math, he built a Log Base E cabin. 

Kim Jong-un can turn a molehill into a mountain range. 

Kim Jong-un once robbed a hitter of a home run in left field despite the fact that he was playing catcher. 

When Kim Jong-un plays Gauntlet, the game doesn’t complain when he takes all the food. 

Kim Jong-un can do the same thing over and over and get a different result each time.

Kim Jong-un can recycle water with his bare hands. 

Kim Jong-un’s computer keyboard is the only one in North Korea with an “ESC” key. 

Kim Jong-un rides a pommel horse in dressage.  In gymnastics, he pummels the horse.

The only time Kim Jong-il ever got out in baseball was when he hit a line-drive up the middle and was hit by the ball as he was sliding into second.

Kim Jong-un can transmit a fax through a soup can telephone.

Kim Jong-un’s pulse is measured in beatings per minute. 

When playing monopoly, Kim Jong-un is paid $200 when his opponents pass Go. 

Parcheesi is Kim Jong-un’s favorite Water Board Game. 

Kim Jong-un can impregnate women via oral sex. 

In gym class as a child, Kim Jong-il could climb the rope using only his feet. 

Kim Jong-un’s finishing move is just the beginning.

Kim Jong-un bid one dollar and won both showcases. 

Kim Jong-un won on Jeopardy by phrasing all of his responses in the form of the SAME question. 

Kim Jong-un’s testes descended four minutes after conception.

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